Is it wrong that despite having someone offering to pay for me to travel, I'd still prefer camwhoring so I can do it on my own?
I've never been comfortable with other people taking care of me. Even when I was on crutches I insisted on doing things on my own. Growing up I learned to stand on my own to feet so now that I have someone willing to help me and take care of me, it's hard to accept it. I'm trying to swallow my pride but I'd much rather go on a vacation that I can contribute to (or completely finance) than be taken out.
Am I trying to keep a distinct separation of the two things, being paid for my company vs wanting to treat me because my own company is a gift? We love each other so who am I to deny him having me around. I love him and I'd love to spend that time with him. Maybe he thinks that if he does this I won't be so interested in sex work anymore. That's not the issue. I'll still be interested in the things I'm interested regardless of the time and money he spends. Work won't change my feelings for him. He's a separate entity.
A job is a job. You just separate the two.